One of the Biggest Needs of the Unfaithful Partner after an Affair: Humility

After an affair, the unfaithful celebration can have problem with an incredible quantity of confusion and disorientation. Of course we understand the betrayed can feel by doing this also, but today is going to focus on a discipline that all stubborn spouses can gain from: the view from the bottom. Borrowed from a commentary by Richard Rohr, shares the need for the unfaithful celebration to embrace and practice humility, both in their approach to life in general, and particularly towards their betrayed partner and children. From mindsets of entitlement to self-preoccupation, unfaithfuls make the same errors time and time again, and it only sets them, and their relationships, back in spades. Listen today as Samuel shares hope for those who are looking for a new beginning, both in life and in healing work.

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" The Healing Library provided me 24/7 assistance since I might be up at 3am and look for the topic I was struggling with. It also assisted as a couple since we could examine subjects together so it wasn't subjective. I trusted this details because it was from experts who likewise had actually endured and recuperated from extramarital relations. Double reliability in my book.".
– Amanda, Florida.

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Samuel is an extramarital relations survivor and is one of many factors to Affair Recovery's Survivors' Blog site,. He took part in Affair Healing's courses established by creator and cheating expert Rick Reynolds, LCSW. After discovering recovery, hope, and brand-new life, Samuel wishes to share his journey and what has to offer with others so they too can discover hope and healing.

One of the Biggest Needs of the Unfaithful Partner after an Affair: Humility

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  1. How do I get past all the lies from my spouses 1.5 affair? His affair was from a friend of his that became the (close family friend), & yes that person became friendly with our 2 youngest grown kids who know about the affair now. He had started talking more about our family & he never told me how depressed he was. She had been in love (lust) with him sine High School 30 years ago. I had never cared for her but he always thought she was a good person (yeah right). after starting seeing how she really was & begging him to leave me (which he never did) he started seeing how she was (she also had other guys on the side & had kicked her 3rd husband out) he finally confessed to me what had happened. The hardest part for me is how emotionally attached he became & hateful he treated me & I don’t know how to get past this? And yes we were in counseling this whole affair. Another hard part is no one believed me. He is remorseful & is talking more but I feel like I ‘m getting the trickled truth. I also found out she stalked our home & amazing enough would show up when we were out. How do I get past this?

    1. hi sherry. that’s a lot for sure. i’m so sorry you have to deal with so much pain and hurt and just overall trauma. i do think it’s possible to heal but it will take infidelity specific work to grieve the losses before being able to forgive them. it may help to understand more about what was going on in the mind of your partner as well which we can help with. it’s no easy fix, but a process can help that’s from experts who have been through it before personally. i would suggest the ems weekend or ems online courses we have on our site as well as finding an expert that can help you work through it. you can email for more help, insight and suggestions. i’m so glad you’re here to find help though.

    2. Hard to believe but your story has many strong similarities
      You are not alone! It’s like there’s a playbook or some pathetic script

  2. From where was that Richard Rohr quote? I looked up his books and there are so many but none of them implies it addresses humility.

  3. One of thee most important things the offender must realize. It doesn’t matter what you do outside, meaning for work, community, mentoring, etc. Wht you did to your spouse eclipses all of that, because while doing all those other seemingly good deed, you crapped on your marriage and you must own that and humility is what’s has to happen. Thanks for the video.

  4. Thank you Samuel. I have been watching your videos for the past 4 years. I am a betrayed spouse and most of my recovery came through your videos and the Harboring Hope community. I don’t know how I would have gotten better. I did want to let you know the far reaching impact your community has. My daughter just found out she has been betrayed by her partner for years. I was able to send her partner your video. I know it’s going to make an impact. They have 2 beautiful children together. God bless you.

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