Can a marriage survive an affair?

A wife who found her husband's on Facebook asks: can their be conserved? helps them find out how to reconstruct after trust and adultery concerns.

Can a survive an affair?

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About the Author: Renee Love


  1. sometimes second chances embolden liars and cheaters. they may change for a while but once they forget the pain of the separation…right back at it. maybe if I was married it would be worth I-t but while Im dating or even in a serious relationship…I NEVER rewind.

  2. I wouldn’t take him back, he cheated, and he made those same promises at their wedding however many years before and look where they ended up. Way to go Tenisha for the forgiveness. I hope it works out

  3. Social Media, FB and cell phones, items that cheaters should never use, own or have.
    Now, she’s going to have to play cop and detective all during their marriage. Is it worth it?

  4. This same mess happen to me and it was devastating !!!! Needless to say my marriage did not survive I never even got a ” I’m sorry ” but I forgave him and moved on I’m at peace

    1. Wow. You’re a strong woman. I met a crazy lady today who told stay with my lying husband because that’s what she is doing. She is staying knowing her is unfaithful and says she is ok with it but cussing up a storm at the same time. I am suppose to ok because he comes home at night and stop complaining she suggested. What are our standards for ourselves?

    1. @earlibee what t u talking about ?! The man is still friends on fb with the same woman he cheated with !!! All he just did here on air was just for show ! I truly hope that she gets away from him & find Mr. Tight for her !!!!

  5. I know this is very archaic of me but if someone steps out on me , I could never allow myself to be with them, only because I could never trust them again.

  6. I loved when all the woman yelled “KNEES!” Damn right.
    I don’t know if my marriage would survive if my husband cheated. That is like the ultimate betrayal and ya there is a reason someone cheats, but ultimately the person who cheated is to blame. You can be tempted, but that don’t mean you need to let yourself crumble into temptation. Just my thoughts.

    1. +Grace B I hear you, absolutely the cheater is at fault. However, people make mistakes. And that’s what it is – the mother of all mistakes. My ex-wife cheated on me when I was in the military. I was the one who wanted it to work and get past it, but not once did she apologize or even act like she did anything wrong. I was the one who suggested counseling. I was the one who wanted to go on a two week vacation to reconnect. I was the one trying to fix the wrong that she did, and that was the mistake I made.

      Bottom line is that if she would have owned up to her mistake, begged for forgiveness, and then spent every day proving to me her love and sorrow until the wounds were healed, it would have been OK. We stayed together for a couple more years and she eventually left me anyways, blaming me for our marriage falling apart.

      Forgiveness can work miracles, but the offender has to want to be forgiven. Otherwise, it’s nothing but resentment for both parties.

    2. @TheGotham84 Most likely you would if the other person really showed their sorrow and worked at fixing it.

    3. +It’s Me if that’s what YOU would do that’s ok. I don’t knock it. But the relationship wouldn’t be the same. In order to truly move on you have to let that go. And that’s not something IM able to do. Again im speaking for myself. I salute those who have the ability to forgive and move on

    4. I’ll forgive you but I won’t ever forget. Also, I’ll have to leave you. I can’t stay with cheaters I just can’t. I’m not going to live a miserable life because I love you. I can love you from a distance, then I’ll eventually heal. Most of the time, staying with a cheater is bad anyways.

  7. An affair is not a mistake as he put it…it’s a choice. The wife’s body language is speaking volumes! She is furious and hurt!!

  8. I don’t think that this marriage is going to be saved. He asks for her trust. That must be earned. He has crushed her and completely ruined the feelings she has for him. Yes, a marriage can be saved after an affair, but I have my doubts that this guy has what it takes to truly make it happen.

    He is still friends with his mistress on facebook. If he was sincerely sorry, he wouldn’t have to be told to cut his ties with her. He wants to put the affair into “The past” and move forward. Of course he does! He doesn’t want to take responsibility for his infidelity. You cannot move forward without repentance. This guy clearly expects his betrayed wife to just forget about the affair and move along as if noting ever happened. It doesn’t work that way.

    This marriage will fail.

    1. +Tom Moog In the end of the day it’s all about actions not sweet words which fixes such things. Though it depends on the individuals too and if both want it to be fixed. The “bad” person had to first rearn the basic trust back before one can work on fixing the relationship part too. Trust is the basis of any relationship with someone.

    2. Why in the world do these cheaters cheat? Remain single and do go in broken marriages, families, your kids trust. Is over! Forget it!

  9. Has he actually seen his wife? She is beautiful! I hope they were able to genuinely work their marriage out.

  10. Once the trust is gone, it’s a wrap! Her body language said it all..None of the begging and pleading on t.v. won’t fix a damn thing…nope.

    1. Absolutely! She may not have said many words, but she spoke VOLUMES with that body language! You know all her trust is completely diminished when she would rather sit facing Steve than have any type of closeness to her own man. What a sleazeball of a man! I hope he has learned his lesson and truly has amended his ways. I would like an update on them.

    2. Also he was holding her hand, if you look carefully his fingers are clasped around her hand and her own were still open like she did not want to hold his hand

    1. She’s hurt and she doesn’t trust him. I wouldn’t want to sit next to him either. Body language is everything.

  11. In marriage you have to love your wife like God loves the church and gave His life for HER !!!!!
    There no other options

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